You’re Not Meant to Go Through Life Feeling Bad

Jennifer Sneeden
2 min readJul 8, 2023

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Photo by Federica Bisso on Unsplash

You’re not meant to go through life feeling bad.

No, really.

You’re meant to go through life with as much joy and exuberance as a 4 year-old running through a sprinkler with abandon on a hot summer day. You’re meant to enjoy your life. You’re meant to laugh. You’re meant to delight in your day.

As a therapist, I know this sounds pretty radical to most people. So many people believe that they’re meant to struggle their way through life, exhuasted, stressed, and hoping to make it through the day in one piece. That’s why people call me: For help getting from Point A to Point B.

Here’s what happens:

We all have “emotional set points”, the emotion that we tend toward most of the time. It becomes our default setting; our way of seeing the world. Are you generally grumpy? Worried? Anxious? Sad? Angry? Or are you cheerful? Bubbly? Joyous?

We all have a full range of emotions, and none of our emotions are wrong or bad. Emotions only become a problem when we’re “stuck” on one that we don’t really like.

Maybe you anger easily because your father angered easily, and you think that’s what it means to be a strong man. Or maybe you complain frequently because that got you attention when you were a child. Maybe you went through a traumatic experience that left you scared and anxious.

It doesn’t matter how this pattern started, you do have the power to change it. It starts with a simple decision. Make the decision that you are ready to start feeling better. That’s it. Simply decide that you want to start feeling better.

Don’t worry about how. That will come in time. But by making the decision, you will begin to see opportunities present themselves all around you. Maybe you’ll feel inspired to read a great book, cook dinner for your partner, or even call a therapist for help.

One of my favorite parts of being a therapist is being part of amazing transformations in my clients lives. I’ve seen clients come from intense trauma and reclaim amazing lives. Happiness is possible. Joy is possible. For all of us.

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